Sunday column: Crazy pets

The first step is admitting that you have a problem, right?
I'm proud to say that I accomplished that first step this week, but it was on behalf of the two furry members of my family. I, like all of you I'm sure, have no problems of my own that I need to admit to, of course. Which is why I've taken it upon myself to speak up for Casey the dog and Caddy the cat.
These two are riddled with problems, and their problems always seem to become my problems before long.
The odd thing is, both the cat and the dog seem to have a similar problem, yet each expresses it in her own unique way.
I believe my pets have a touch of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.
Now let me stop here and be completely clear about something: I realize OCD is a serious and very real mental illness. In no way am I poking fun at those who suffer from it; I have simply made some observations over the past year or so that lead me to believe there very well may be OCD tendencies that exist in certain domesticated animals. Namely, my domesticated animals.
Let's start with Caddy. I found her at a cat shelter in 2003 and she's been with me ever since. We've made many, many moves and been through a lot together. She was even gracious enough to allow my husband into the fold once he entered the picture. If you've ever had a cat, then you know how significant that is. Not to say she doesn't turn on him from time to time … but, she does the best she can.
Caddy is a ray of sunshine in my life in every way except one. Her feline OCD seems to flare up at the most inopportune times — i.e., in the middle of the night.
She always curls up nicely with me when I go to bed, where I suppose she's just biding her time before she strikes. Her target: my glasses. At night, I take off my glasses and put them on the bedside table. Inevitably, before the night is over, Caddy has snuck over to the table and attacked them. Her favorite thing is to knock them somewhere in the room that's hard to get to, especially in my condition — bleary-eyed from sleep and practically blind without any contacts or glasses.
Why does Caddy insist upon battering my glasses night after night? Why, no matter where I put them — make that, hide them — is she able to locate my glasses and pounce? Why does she leave my husband's glasses untouched night after night?
These are the mysteries that, as a pet owner, it is my burden to endure.
At least Casey's OCD rears its ugly head in the light of day. She's a Border Collie mix that Nick and I adopted about a year ago whose facial expressions and unfailingly happy personality keep us highly entertained. A few months ago, we noticed that she seemed to always run a particular route around our house. She'll dash from the front door to the back door, then over to the corner by the entertainment center and back again. She runs full steam ahead to each checkpoint, gives it a sniff or two, then scrambles on to the next one.
If she were running this triangular route on anything but our vinyl floor, there would be a clear path worn from door to door to corner.
She does this over and over again, no matter how many toys we give her or how much we walk her. I don't believe it's a matter of her burning up unspent energy or being bored. I believe she has a compulsion to repeatedly check these areas of our house.
It's a fairly harmless thing, nothing like Caddy's destructive late-night behavior. The only annoyance or danger comes if you happen to cross her path at the wrong moment, which will result in both Casey and you skidding across the floor.
But she'll just bounce right back up and resume her checks.
Caddy and Casey, in spite of their various "quirks," help keep our household busy and amusing.
Casey is constantly trying to sneak some of Caddy's food, and Caddy has recently decided that she will drink only from Casey's water bowl.
Then there's the constant symphony of growling, hissing, barking and meowing that reverberates through the house when they get on each other's nerves.
Of course, we wouldn't have it any other way.
Plus, I finally found a way to recover my glasses a little quicker after Caddy's finished with them at night — I wake up my husband and make him find them.